You Don’t Drink Coffee??? WHAT???
Friend: Hey let’s stop at *insert coffeehouse here*
Me: Sure, ok. Do they have hot chocolate or tea by chance?
Friend: Why go to a coffeehouse if your going to get hot cocoa or tea?
Me: Well so we can hang out and I can have a drink.
Friend: Why not just get a triple jumbo grande latte with extra cow, like me!
Me: A what?
Friend: What?? Do you DRINK coffee? Don’t tell me your an instant coffee person cause then we can’t be friends and stuff!
Me: No…..I don’t drink instant coffee. I don’t drink coffee at all.
Friend: OMG! WHAT? ARE YOU SERIOUS??? Why don’t you drink coffee?
Me: It tastes nasty and it gives me a headache.
Friend: *sits down feeling faint* Coffee is a gift from heaven.
Me: Well , lucky for me since I don’t get to go there!
Friend: *looks around for cameras* Seriously, you don’t drink coffee? When is Candid Camera coming out?
Me: No seriously, I don’t drink it. I will just get tea or something. No biggie.
Friend: No biggie? How can an adult claim not to embark on all that is holy? Don’t pull that pagan card on me!
Me: I just never liked it. I like tea.
Friend: But your a mom. Moms drink coffee.
Me: Well I musta been on vacation when that memo came out.
This is a typical conversation between me and coffee lovers at the moment that they find out I am not a mutal coffee lover. I swear I get looks between “You must be an alien from a distant galaxy” to “OMG she must be some sort of leper where if she has coffee a limb falls off”. This is just to give a final shout that I am from planet Earth and my limbs don’t fall off. Although I understand your enthusiasm for coffee, I don’t understand the shock. Some of the questions I get really shock me. Most recently I heard “Oh, you musta grown up in London”. Hmmm nope sorry. Born and raised in USA by two coffee drinking parents. So next time you meet a non-coffee enthusiast, don’t be shocked. Be thankful. That means more coffee for you!