So hubs is struggling. Rightfully so, he was close to his brother. Yesterday he spent most of the morning in bed. He had said that he hadn’t had any alone time and that was all he wanted. So I let him go be alone. I won’t step in on something like that unless it becomes a major habit. He needs some time alone to deal with it all.
I am finding a new “predicament” arising. It is a bit like a double edged sword. People are naturally wanting to express their condolences. I know I do it whenever someone I know loses someone. But when is the right time? How long do you give the family time to process? As of right now, my husband is trying to avoid certain situations so that he doesn’t have to hear “I am so sorry for your loss”. It’s not that he doesn’t appreciate the condolences, it’s just that it opens the floodgates. And in a way he is at this point where he is tired of thinking about it, tired of crying about it, tired of having everyone say something. It’s a tough situation to be in since no one wants to lash out and start screaming at everyone to shut the hell up.
Only time will tell. I know that it’s going to take time, I hope he understands it as well.
~ by alegna75 on May 29, 2009.
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