The Frustration of Halloween

Yes, there is frustration. I live in a place full of double standards. Some people get angry because the schools no longer have Christmas Entertainment but Holiday Entertainment. We have taken “Christ out of Christmas”. Yet we can’t celebrate Halloween because it is the “Devil’s Day”.

What sort of started this snowball of frustration was my friend Katie. She lives in Salem, Massachusetts. As much as she loves Halloween she doesn’t really like the influx of people there. She actually has joked about coming down here and visiting me just so she can get away from it all. As a person living in a tourist town, I totally get it. So I found this website for Salem and all of the upcoming events they have going on. I was instantly jealous. They have stuff going on ALL THE TIME. Almost daily! Not just spooky stuff but historical tours and what not. I told her once again for the 590275089730571095 time that I really wanted to come up. Our financial situation says No though. Boo. So I start looking for things locally. Already we are doing a haunted trail in a couple weeks, our party, hitting a pumpkin patch, and the Samhain Ritual. Oh and yes, my kids will get to do some trick or treating. So I start looking locally for things to do.Nothing, nada, zip. It is as if Halloween doesn’t exist. I start asking around to the few people I know who love Halloween. Again, nothing…nada…zip.

So I got sad. When I was growing up it was a big deal. I mean EVERYONE did something and it was always a blast. Part of me feels like my kids are missing out and I am struggling to find things for them to do so its not just about one night but the entire month. I start thinking about the party in two weeks. I allowed my girls to invite some classmates to come that night and they are excited. The nervous part of me got worried about how some of the parents may react.  I think it would be stupid to be sending them notes saying, “Hey I am pagan, it’s ok though we aren’t sacrificing any animals and I won’t turn your kids into toads”, but I would hate to see confrontation on the night of a good time, know what I mean? So I got myself really worked up over it (isn’t bipolar disorder grand?) and haven’t slept well. The next day i ran into Molly’s bff’s mother, Lucia. She is very excited, her girls are excited, and as we talked I ended up inviting her girls to spend the night. It is not the first time or anything. The whole conversation just made me feel a tad bit better. I am not too worried about that family, it is the other ones that I am worried about…still. It didn’t get better when just a little while ago I received a phone call from an angry parent whose child we had invited to our party. To put it in a nutshell she is going to call the school and request that her daughter or mine get switched to another class so that her daughter doesn’t have to be around the satan worshipping child. To say that I was angry would be a gross understatement. I mean really folks….we live in the 21st century and people STILL are ignorant. I didn’t have much chance to say anything, this woman went on a rampage that I can barely remember. My mind is still stuck on that satan worshipping comment. I will not allow my daughter to be moved NOR will I allow anyone to belittle my daughter because of MY spirituality. I am awaiting the inevitable phone call from the school to see what happens. I am going to make every attempt to be calm even though I really want to rip this woman’s face apart for making assumptions about my child. My daughter is still on a path of discovery and is not completely sure what is right for her. Now she has to deal with ignorant alleged adults????

And the worst part, I blame me. I shouldn’t have allowed her to invite anyone. I should have been more picky. I should have been more quiet. I know that at some point she will have to deal with what people MIGHT say about her mom being pagan. But I can’t help but want to protect her. As much as I know she can overcome it, grow from it…she is insanely smart….I still would rather her not feel the hurt. She seems too young to have to deal with all that. But then when will I see her as not so young anymore? When will I be able to step back and let her experience it and then be there for her to cry with?

This is all very frustrating.

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~ by alegna75 on October 10, 2008.

7 Responses to “The Frustration of Halloween”

  1. I don’t even know where to start….

    I’m Christian (Catholic to be exact) and we do Halloween too… and it has religious meaning for us too – if we choose to inject it. Personally I think that’s a good idea lol. My kids won’t be allowed to dress up like devils for obvious reasons… but I see no harm in most costume ideas or dressing up in general & asking for candy (even if that is the part of the holiday that evolved from pagan traditions). What does bother me is hearing other Christians say that it is unChristian to do so… same issue as you, but from a different perspective.

    As for the party & parents comment… Uggh. I could see an issue if you were inviting kids to the Samhain ritual… although I would have handled that differently… I wouldn’t allow my child to go, and would prob explain why – just in nicer terms lol. But a party? Come on… It’s not like you’re going to be giving “pagan lessons” there lol. Now if someone is concerned… ask what’s involved. Make a judgment call after finding out, not before or from jumping to conclusions… And for petes sake, read up a little on the religion before going off & shoving your foot (more like up to hip) in your mouth! The class switching this is just awful… I’m really sorry for your daughter (and the woman’s) for having to be put through that for someone elses stupidity/ignorance. Sorry, soapbox here… lol

  2. Thank you for the comment! I had to LOL at the pagan lessons. Our guest list is, well basically all of our friends from all walks of religions. Buddhists, Catholics, Lutherans, a very few number of Baptists (but they are being represented!), Mormons, and of course Pagans, I could see just how well pagan lessons would go hahahaha. The intent of the party is to dress up and eat and have fun and this woman just went way off course in her thinking. I would have much rather her ask me outright about any of it before going off on me. I would never ever try to push my spirituality, especially children! But sadly this happens quite a bit around here and I am still trying to deal with it. I love this area even with its oddities. We are a melting pot of everything religious, spiritual, and including sexual orientation….and yet we are so divided. I told my husband (whom is Presbyterian) that it is moments like this where I wish we could move. But then why should I? The picture in my header is a local one, it embodies everything that I love about Isis and Osiris and I shouldn’t have to leave it because of the ignorant jerks around here. BAH! I am just going to reread your statement about pagan lessons so I can giggle again.

  3. I was thinking a lot about this recently too in that Halloween seems to have gotten more off limits to some families over the years or maybe it’s just the town we live in which is Christian I don’t know. I am excited that my daughter’s preschool has been reading halloween books and doing cool halloween crafts. They are also have a party on halloween day. Our town has a downtown trick or treating and then we get quite a few trick or treaters at the house but there are some neighbors (the conservative christians) that don’t decorate and go to church for a “harvest party” that night or yes think of it as satan’s birthday! It should be a fun holiday for ALL children in my opinion and it’s sad that the parent you mentioned went to such extremes. It’s just weird. Get over it! Or maybe it’s people realizing that it was a pagan holiday I don’t know. I think annual traditions are great for your daughter to look forward to the Samhain season. You could do some crafts and we always get a new Halloween book too. I think I should make a blog post from this instead of replying so much on here! Anyways hope you find some fun things to do and don’t let the crazy people get you down.
    Amy

  4. YOU should have done nothing differently. YOU have every right to invite people to your home without fear of religious persecution. YOU should not have to fear that “adults” are afraid of little children. YOU should not have to explain anything to anyone.

    That other woman should be deeply ashamed of her words and her actions. I’d pull out the works and do a big fat binding on her sorry ass!

    And if the school even thinks about moving YOUR kid, I’d tell them right off that you’ll hire a lawyer and go straight to the national media for religious persecution. (even if you wouldn’t – they will shit their pants).

    People like that INFURIATE me. The best revenge? Have a great big, fat Halloween party and make sure everyone who comes has a great time!! F. her!

  5. I agree 100% with Mrs. B. YOU did nothing wrong, your daughter did nothing wrong. DO NOT blame yourself. There are people like that no matter where you are and you just have to kinda brush it off, ( I know it’s easier said than done). You can always ask your daughter if she feels embarrassed about anything that is going on. You’ll be surprised, a lot of the time the emotions or situations of what ever is going on, that kids are able to brush off a lot easier and have no problem with.

    Hope that made sense!

    Spider Lady

  6. Do NOT blame yourself for this. I seriously don’t get why people have to be this way. Unfortunately it’s usually the ones that claim to be the most Christian that do it. The kids shouldn’t have to pay for our spiritual decisions. I agree with Mrs B. If they try and move your kids threaten them with the lawyer and watch them freak.

  7. Gods, I’m orry that only today I read about this… I’m shocked. It’s really insane that anyone still have this thinking… Just don’t you blame yourself, you id nothing wrong, for gods’ sake!

    There will always be ignorant people no matter in which century we’re living unfortunately. I still hope youhave a great tie at your party.

    Going to read your last post now, I scrolled down to update myself.

    Kisses from Nydia.

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